Wednesday, April 20, 2011

When I Was Eight, I Proudly Declared That I Knew That "WTF" Meant "Wow, That's Funny," And Have Been Using It All Over The Internet Since.


Tonight, we here at I Don't Skinny Dip I Chunky Dunk have quite a bit in stock for your entertainment. Why, you ask? Because it's the...
Yes folks! It really is the 1ooth Follower Spectacular! I, Eeshie of New York City, have successfully managed to reach 100 followers! Say it with me: Huzzah! Huzzah!

And let me tell you, kids. This 100th Follower Spectacular!  is going to be the longest, greatest, most awesome-est, most watermelon-flavored, cough-inducing post up to date! Hip hip hooray! Seriously. I'm going to make this post awesome. It'll take you a year and a half to complete it. You'll think of me and this post in your sleep. Just you wait...

Now to start the night off, I'd like to mention that I actually talked to Mr. Pedophilic Ice Cream Man on Sunday, the 17th (Learn about him on this post) My brother and I were forced to attend this huge fair/function/event/thing/possum with our parents that Sunday. We didn't know anyone. My friends and his friends were supposed to come, but they wouldn't be coming until hours later. So we were pretty much sitting there in the center of all the excitement, bored out of our minds.

I couldn't take it anymore, so I asked my brother if he'd walk around nearby blocks with me. Anything would be more interesting than what we were enduring now. He said yes and we were off.

As soon as we stepped out of the fair/function/event/thing/possum, that familiar little jangle came. I gritted my teeth.

"Ooh! I want ice cream!" My brother said, digging out his wallet for a few bills.

I gave my older brother a look.

"What?" he asked, confused.

I deepened the look.


"Yns. It's him."

"Ohh..." he said, remembering. "So I shouldn't get ice cream?"

I shrugged. "Eh, what the hell. You might as well get it."

We approached the truck. Mr. Pedophilic Ice Cream Man (we shall abbreviate him as Mr. PICM) had been sitting, but he glanced over at me while I was walking towards him. He sat up straight and poked his head out the window with this sleazy grin and a sly look to his eyes.

Oh yeah. And he was wearing a do-rag. Ha ha!

He basically eyed me up and down, just like that (I was wearing this really dazzling dress for the fair/function/event/thing/possum.), over and over. And then he saw my brother, tall and looming with this steely look on his face.

He stopped.

There was a moment of silence for a few seconds, as both Yns and Mr. PICM looked at each other. Then, my brother spoke.

"How much for a vanilla cone?"

"Vanilla cone?" Mr. PICM asked. He seemed a bit disoriented with my brother standing there. HA. "Uh...two dollars."

 That's overpriced! I thought immediately. I realized how childish I sounded to myself, complaining. Really, I was just annoyed with him, no matter how high or low the price of his ice cream was. And then, I realized both my brother and Mr. PICM were staring at me. And then, horrified, I realized that I had spoken those two words out loud.

Aw, shee-it.

I tried turning this act of my stupidity into a diss for him. I shot him this sugar-coated smile, the kind that could only be described as sickeningly sweet. It was wayyy fake; even a drunk could tell. Again, I immediately said, "That's overpriced." Cue the smile.

Most people back off when they see this evil smile of mine. This smile of mine means, “Cut the crap.” But Mr. PICM wasn't fazed. At all. In fact, he welcomed my smile. Did not question it at all. For all I know, he probably thinks I'm interested.

He smiled back. "Sorry, all the ice cream around here has the same price."

Seeing that he was not fazed, and now annoyed at myself more than anything, I simply turned on my heel and walked away, scowling. Yns followed suit.

After we were away from his ears, I asked my brother, "Do you think he recognized me?"

"I don't know," my brother snapped. He seemed a bit annoyed.

I stopped. "What?"

Yns hesitated, and then spit it out. "You were too friendly with him! And you smiled too much!"

I was surprised. I hadn't thought I was smiling too much. In fact, the smile I had given him was one I had delicately crafted years ago for one purpose: teachers I hated. Over the years, I gave it a few tweaks here and there to serve other purposes, such as showing a certain pedophilic ice cream dude how much I hate him. But it never occurred to me that my cleverly crafted smiles could backfire...

Well. Guess it's back to the mirror -- ahem, drawing board for me.

And now on a completely random note, here are a series of pictures that I found on the web a few weeks ago. Enjoy!

A Pictorial Guide to Avoiding Camera Loss by Andrew McDonald


You know, the fair/function/event/thing/possum wasn't all that bad, I have to admit. I ended up leaving with a $50 giftcard to Barnes & Noble, which I intend on spending very, very soon (Any suggestions as to what books I should buy?) My brother got one, too. About eight people did. They were all for teens who got into those really hard to get into schools that I mentioned many posts ago. Remember what I'm talking about? I got into the second best (some call it the best, but I call it second best) high school in New York City, and my brother got into THE best high school in New York City. Whoo!

Yeah, so my brother and I both had to go on stage with our parents to receive the award. Not fun. And while holding our giftcards and certificates and roses, we had to put on our best smiles and wait for the camera flashing to stop so we could leave. My lips felt like rubber after that one.

She (and I hate to admit this) looked rather cute in her dress. "Eeshie!" she exclaimed. We complimented each others dresses and she asked me what I had received. I showed her the gift card and she ran to the stage to get hers.

Oh yeah. Guess I didn't mention that. Lydia and I both got into the same amazing school. With me getting a single point higher than her on the admission test. *Phew*

We left shortly after getting our awards. I was so happy about that. We ditched the dumb fair/function/event/thing/possum and hit up the Chinese fast food restaurant. Hell yeah.

Oh yeah! Almost forgot to mention! I got an award! What a timing, right? My first award, just as I reach 100 followers. I'm epic like that.

I got this lovely award from one of my newest followers, Mr. Lamebutt! His blog is lovely as well. You should really check it out. Really. Check it out. I want you to check it out. Hence the link I've provided to all of you so that all of you can have the joy of reading his lovely blog. 


Go on now. 

And now is the part where I'm supposed to give the One Lovely Blog Award to nine other bloggers. Once again, like I did with the tagging, I'm picking these nine people randomly. You can't expect me to pick the loveliest blogs. I'd end up picking all of them. So I'm picking randomly. Please standby...


Kay, I'm back! Weirdly, some blogs got picked again. Ha!

First up is Ash of The Cheesecake Paradox. Very awesome blog. A great read. I've completely abandoned all homework and studies to read his blog multiple times in the past, and will surely continue to do so. It's worth getting yelled at by Ms. Attorney. His blog is really good. One of my all-time favorite posts of his was his most recent one. This is the link to it. You need to read it. It made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Well, not warm and fuzzy. Reflective and contemplative is more like it.

And it's hard to believe that Ash could get any better, but he can! He was the one who introduced me to writing "Peas out" rather than "Peace out." And for this, I will love him forever and always ten times more.

Next up we have Natalie of A Natalie Moment. People don't get sweeter than her. Or more down-to-earth. She's so nice! I love her! Whenever I post something new, and I see that Natalie has commented, I get all happy and excited inside because she seriously leaves the best comments ever. I love the comments she leaves me. They just make my day. As does her blog. You had better press that link, or I shall come after you.

And now we have Furree Katt Katt! (Her screen name is the same as her blog name.) Her blog is awesomely spunky. The stories she put up there make me laugh insanely. And since she's a teacher (at seventeen. Ain't it cool?), she has pictures and stories of her adorable students on occasion. You need to press this link as well!

The next award-ee is Ryan Mace of Music=Love and Life. Pretty deep title there if you ask me. His writing is amazing. I don't know how many times I've said this. I'm saying it again. He's one of the best poets on Blogger I know. I've seen a lot of poetry blogs on Blogger, and some of them just suck. Some of them are okay, but they could definitely use improvement. And some of them just bore me to tears. But this blog? Ryan Mace of Music=Love and Life? It's amazing and it's perfect and Ryan Mace is a very talented eighteen year old. That's all I've got to say.

Four down. Five to go. Gosh, this is really wearing me out.

Mandy Thomas of Trouble In Mind. She's cool. And funny. And quirky. And I guess I'd have to call her "crazy at times in a good way" after watching her Charlie Sheen Impression.   Watch it!!

Boyd of Boyd's World! This blog is about a really cool dude named Drew Morgan who has AWESOME HAIR! And um...oh yeah! He plays in this really, really, really good band (you can watch their videos on Youtube -- they're called Crush of Society.) Listen to their songs. They're actually good. Andddd, he has AWESOME HAIR!!

Well, well. Looks like I'm awarding Noah Brown of Brown's Eye. He really is a swell blogger. And as I said in my last post, he's so good at surprising. I'm not kidding about this -- out of nowhere a random joke about bitches will come. Who knew?! And I found out that him and I must be soulmates, because he lives in New Jersey. And that's where I used to live up until the end of last September (2010). That's when I moved to where I live now, NYC. I'm telling you. Soul. Mates.

That Blond Guy of The Nerd Archives is a fantastic blogger as well whose blog definitely surpasses loveliness. It's way more than that. It's way too funny. Seriously. Who gave him the right to be that funny?!? I want to know! Oh yeah, and I found out yesterday that I'm his wife. Who knew, right?!? Sweet!

Ah. Last but nowhere near the least, I give the award to Misticalnia at Candles, who happens to be one of my best friends in the whole world and is also my dear cousin. We kind of grew up with each other because we saw (and still see) each other frequently. She's awesome. I love her and her blog. You need to click on that link.


PHEW! I'm done! God! That took me like an hour! You know how long it takes a half-drunk person driving a car with her feet through a cornfield with screaming babies in the backseat to be able to type good things about nine people onto a tiny keyboard the size of a tomato?!?

Nah, just kidding. But it was still difficult. Here's a break from all that reading.

My longtime friend Mischeif Managed introduced me to Bo Burnham. Heard of him? No? Well today is your lucky day. I'm going to introduce him to all of you.

Bo Burnham, as Wikipedia would put it,  is a comedian, singer-songwriter, musician, actor, and Internet celebrity. Writing comedic and satirical songs with a politically incorrect slant, he became famous when his YouTube videos took off.

Thank you, WikiSearch.

The following video is of him freaking out live, as the title says. The rap he's performing is one that he wrote himself called "I'm Bo Yo." It's hilarious. Before you watch the video I'm putting up here, you should probably watch his original one on YouTube. My God, this guy is funny. And I'm not one to say that. I usually get annoyed by these YouTube celebrities. But Bo Burnham? He's the exception. He's the most clever lyricist I've seen up to date, and this video is basically him falling apart on stage. In the very best way possible.

Watch. It.

Did you liiiiiike it?

Are there any more awesome people on YouTube that I don't know about? Damn. I must have been missing out on these guys for all these years.


A five-year-old at my mosque once asked me tentatively during weekend Arabic studies, "Eeshie?"

"Yes?" I answered.

"Do you have a crush on someone?"

I didn't bother looking up. "Do you?" I asked lazily.

"I asked you first!" she said sounding nervous.

I sighed and looked up from what I was doing. "All right, all right. Don't get a heart attack. No, I don't have a crush on anyone."

She was quiet.

"Why? I asked, teasing. "Do you?"

Her squirming made my day. But instead of answering, she asked, "Do you have a boyfriend?"

I was slightly amused at her question, a little shocked, a just a teeny bit scared because she knew my name and I didn't know hers. (Not surprising. Everyone at mosque under ten loves me, and therefore knows my name. Hey, I'm just awesome like that.)

"Why are you asking me questions like this?" I asked her. "I mean, we are in the mosque."

I was hoping she would get the hint. But five-year-old's don't know what hints are.


"Well," I said, lowering my voice so the teachers wouldn't hear me. "Dating is forbidden in Islam, so we shouldn't talk about it while in the mosque."

"But Nadine has had eight boyfriends!" the girl wailed.

I glared at the child and put an angry finger to my mouth to quiet her, as two of the teachers looked over at us.

"Well, Nadine is...Nadine...she..." I didn't know what to say. Nadine is one of my friends, and yeah, she has dated eight dudes. And it isn't exactly right, but I didn't want to outright say it.

"Well..." I said, struggling to come up with something. Finally, I settled for a lame excuse. "Well, she's older than you."

"So? I thought it didn't matter how old you are in Islam. I thought it's bad, no matter how old you are."

"Okay, okay you're right. Nadine is doing something wrong. She shouldn't be dating people."

The little girl seemed content.

"You're really happy now, aren't you, kid?" I mumbled. I should've just stayed quiet, because now the girl had a new line of questions.

"Eeshie, do you wear a hijab when you're at school?"




"No, I don't," I murmured under my breath.



Little girl was quiet. After a long silence, she said, "Well...that's not good."

I didn't answer. This little girl was unbelievably good at making me feel guilty for not being more Islamic.

"Eeshie? Did you ever touch a boy?"

"Go away."

 She giggled all the way back to her seat. I shook my head. I was never going to answer that question...

So there's this artist mom with a baby who found that she could not do a lot of her work now that she has a child. But this mom is creative, so she found a way to incorporate her art into taking care of her baby. While her baby slept on the ground, she'd rearrange and arrange and rearrange everything around the kid to give it a theme.

And now I give you...

Interesting Things To Do With Your Baby While They're Sleeping!

Rainy Baby!

Mary Poppins Baby!
Musical Baby!
Princess and the Pea Baby!
Clothesline Baby!
Walkin' in the Park Baby!
Butterfly Baby!
Bookworm Baby!
Bunny Baby!
Desi Baby!

That was way too cute, wasn't it? WAY too cute.

Oh yeah, I forgot to mention who my 100th follower was. Congratulations Anthony, for making the life-changing decision to follow my blog. To appreciate your kindness, I give you this baby.

Oh yes, Anthony. Oh yes.

So. I'll be going to Barnes & Noble tomorrow with that $50 giftcard. Any book suggestions? Please? I want to read a really, really, insanely good book.

My brother and I were volunteering at the doctor's office my mom volunteers at today. You know - getting in hours and all that? I want to have as much hours as humanely possible for National Honors Society. Currently, I have 99 hours. But none of it was done this year. I got those hours last summer and the summer before that. I need hours for this year.

Anyway. I went there happily, thinking that I'd return with some note-worthy stories to share here. But no. Nothing happened. NOTHING. It was!

Ah, well. Maybe next time, eh?


Oh! You have to read this! I randomly came across this on the web a few days ago. They're comebacks that every woman needs to say at least once in her life. I was laughing at these.

Man: “Haven’t I seen you someplace before?
Woman: “Yeah, that’s why I don’t go there anymore.”

Man: “Is this seat empty?”
Woman: “Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.”

Man: “Your place or mine?”
Woman: “Both. You go to yours and I’ll go to mine.”

Man: “I’d like to call you. What’s your number?”
Woman: “It’s in the phone book.”

Man: “But I don’t know your name.”
Woman: “That’s in the phone book too.”

Man: “So what do you do for a living?”
Woman: “I’m a female impersonator.”
Man: “Hey, come on, we’re both here at this bar for the same reason.”
Woman: “Yeah! Let’s pick up some chicks!”

Man: “I’m here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy.”
Woman: “You mean you’ve got both a donkey and a Great Dane?”

Man: “I know how to please a woman.”
Woman: “Then why aren’t you leaving me alone?”

Man: “I want to give myself to you.”
Woman: “Sorry, I don’t accept cheap gifts.”

Man: “If I could see you naked, I’d die happy.
Woman: “Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I’d probably die laughing.”

Man: “Your body is like a temple.”
Woman: “Sorry, there are no services today.”

Man: “I’d go through anything for you.”
Woman: “Good! Let’s start with your bank account.”

Man: “I would go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: “Yes, but would you stay there?

Girl power! Whoo!

Yes, guys can definitely be annoying at times. My friend Logan was walking me home halfway a couple weeks ago (Don't ask...), and we somehow got into the topic of his girlfriend.

"So, Paula got reeeeally amazing grades for the third quarter," I said, teasing him. "You must be a really lucky guy."

"Yeah, I guess..." he murmured.

"What's wrong? Oh, God no. Don't tell me you''re...jealous of her grades?!" I asked, horrified.

"No, no! Of course not!" he assured me. "It's just that...sometimes I wish..."

"What? What do you wish? What?! Tell me!"

"Naw, you're definitely going to slap me.”

No! No, I promise I won't!”

Well...” he said, scratching his head. Finally, he blurted it out. “I wish Paula had bigger boobs!”

I slapped him.

What the hell!? You said you weren't going to slap me!”

Yeah, and when I met you, I thought you were an okay guy,” I said angrily. “How can you say that?!”

What?” he asked sheepishly. “I'm a teenage guy. With teenage guy thoughts. You can't possibly expect anything else from me.”

Logan! Oh my God, do you know how selfish that was?! And...and rude?! And sexist?! And rude?!? And mean?! And cruel?! And...and...” I was getting breathless.

Eeshie, calm down. Don't yell at me. I mean, come on. It's not like you don't wish your boyfriend had a bigger dick.”

I was confused. “But I don't have a boyfriend.”

Logan snapped his fingers. “Exactly!”


I shook my head. “Logan, you're not making any sense. You, as Paula's boyfriend, should be the last person wishing she looked differently. In fact, you shouldn't want her to be changed in any way. You should like her just the way she is!”

He broke out in song. “Cause you're amazing...just the way you are...”

Logan. Dude. I'm serious,” I said in a flat voice.

He stopped. “All right, all right. I won't say it ever again.”



But it's annoying, you know? It has to be my girlfriend with the small boobs?” he asked indignantly to no one in particular.

Man, shut up. I don't want to hear you.”

But no. Logan was getting quite fired up. “I mean, it's just not fair! Can't Paula have bigger boobs Macy's? Or Zainab's? Or MH's? Or yours?”

I instinctively raised my books in front of my chest. “Dude. You've got some serious issues.”

No, I'm serious!”

You know, it's weird that you have so much time to check out other girls' boobs. Isn't it?”

Can you give Paula some pointers on getting big boobs?”

Now here, I didn't know whether to bite his head off or crack up. I did both.

I smacked his shoulder with my book. “Logan! Shut up!” And then I laughed. He took this as a good sign.

So are you going to do it?”

My expression changed. Annoyed, I said, “No.”


Okay, I guess it wasn't the nicest thing to say.”

You got that right.”

We continued walking.

All right, I'm sorry. It's not my fault that I've got the desires of a teenage boy.”

Logan, you should really appreciate Paula. She's sweet, pretty, sings amazing, and she's really smart. Big boobs aren't the main focus in a relationship, you know.”

He nodded solemnly. “Thank you for that wonderful insight, Oprah.”

You're really funny, Logan,” I said, giving him the same smile I had given the ice cream man. He froze.

Okay, I'm sorry. For real this time. Jesus Christ. Next time you smile at me like that, I swear I'm going to wet my pants.”

I grinned (Regularly this time).

You're really scary, Eeshie.”

I know, right? I can't stand looking at mirrors because I just start screaming.”

If I had that smile of yours, I would, too. In fact, I'd get plastic surgery to change it.”

You're totally right. I should get plastic surgery to change this scary face of mine.”

Yeah. I bet all the mothers steer clear of you because you make their babies cry.”


And I bet the teachers give you good grades just so that you'll stay away from them.”

Ha. Ha ha. Funny.”

And I bet all the villains of the world are scared of you and your freaky smile.”

Ha. Okay, now shut up.”

We parted our ways after that, him running off like a little school-girl, calling some more insults as he did.

Dumba$$. And that's me using the term nicely.

I think I'll end this post soon. I bet ya'll are getting sick of me by now. My God, I'm practically getting sick of myself by now. I started writing this post on Monday, and it's Wednesday now, and I'm finally finishing it. Hot damn.

I'm asking again: Does any one have any good book suggestions? I'm going to Barnes & Nobles tomorrow, and I've got a $50 giftcard. I need to spend it.

Now, since I enjoy going out with a BANG! here's a heartbreaking video that you must watch. I've linked to it before, but I have a feeling that only one or two of you actually watched it. So here it is again, right in front of your face. Tell me if you cried. I cried while watching this. Tell me if you did.

Ain't it deep?

Well, looks like I'm going to go now. But before I leave, I'll tell you why I made such a big deal of reaching 100 followers and changed the background solely for this post and went all berserk. It's basically because I seriously never thought I'd reach this much followers. Back in November 2010, when I first sat down and thought, "Hey. Why don't I start a blog?" I only had five followers. Three of them were friends from my old school, one was my cousin, and the last one was me. And that was it. It went like that for a while, but slowly I got my sixth follower. Then my seventh. And then my tenth. And then my fourteenth. And then my twentieth (God, I had like a heart attack when I reached 20 followers). And somehow, I now have 100 followers. And I mean, even though I'm just some random hormonal teenage girl who you probably passed on the street a few days ago without realizing it, and even though it's just my dumb old, rinky-dink blog, I still feel like I accomplished something. You know?

And I just want to say thanks. You guys all cheer me up on those ugly, horrible days where I either feel like smashing a carton of eggs against Lady Gaga's expensive couch or just curling up in a ball on my bed and weeping softly with my pink Snuggie around me. (I'm weird). I know I say this a million times, so it probably sounds fake, but you guys seriously make me smile and cheer me up. Some of your words of comfort or your words of support or just your hilarious jokes make me happy again. And for that, I'll be in debt to you for a million years.

Cheers, my friends. To 100 followers, and perhaps many more in the future. Thank you.


  1. Congratulations haha. I like the baby pictures xD

    I want 100 followers....lols

  2. Congrats on 100 followers :D and great post too. Thanks for the shout out as well :P and I was wondering about that 'peas out' thing haha but I didn't know for sure whether I'd put you onto it heh.

    That little girl grilling you at the mosque sounds like a woman trapped in a little girl's body haha. I don't think I've ever heard a 5 year old ask questions of that nature... And that Logan guy... I gotta say, he sounds like a bit of a shallow egghead. Bit creepy as well, openly talking about stuff like that, and behind his gf's back as well. Ah well, what do I know.

    Anyways, again, kudos on you reachin 100 followers, you deserve it cos your blog is awesomesauce on a plate. Keep on blogging ma'am, keep on blogging.

    Peas out :P

  3. I think someone un-followed you just now so that it would annoy the heck out of you. Guess who.


  4. that was seriously one AWESOME post!!!
    you know i generally hate reading long posts... but now, i dint even realise that it ended!!! Seriously THAT awesome :)

  5. Oh my goodness. This post was pretty much AWESOMELY AWESOME.

    First of all, holy crap. Close encounters with the creepy pedophile ice cream man! And you managed to survive! I am so glad to hear that... haha. But seriously, 2 bucks for 1 ice cream cone? Major rip off! You can get like an entire tub of it for that much.

    That was a pretty epic camera/photo series thingamajig, I must agree. That man is a genius. :D

    Awww, thank you very much for the award. :) In my post for tomorrow I'm doing this tag thing and I tagged you in it, so look out for that! And if you feel like doing that, then feel free! Hehe. :)

    BO BURNHAM. YES. I LOVE HIM. Other YouTube peoples? Well... I watch a lot of YouTube. It's kind of ridiculous. Somehow I still manage to have kind of alife. But some of my personal favorites are CharlieIsSoCoolLike, VlogBrothers, AmazingPhil, and MrArturoTrejo.

    Little kids always say the darndest things, don't they?

    I can't wait until that baby grows up and gets to look back on all of that insane adorableness! I am so doing that with my future children...

    And holy cow, that's a lot of community service hours! You are sure to get into NHS.

    OH, BOYS. HOW THEY DO FRUSTRATE ME SO. I really wish boobs weren't the only things on their minds, but it would appear that is pretty much the case... Which means I'm pretty much doomed because I am basically totally flat chested. Le sigh.

    Anyways, have fun spending that $50 gift card! I don't know what you have already read, but I will always recommend John Green (Looking For Alaska), Jonathan Safran Foer (Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close), and Markus Zusack (The Book Thief).

    Oh, and congrats on the 100 followers!!! YAY! :D

  6. yayyy congrats on 100 followers! and the pics of that guy about the camera were pretty cool, I wanna try that sometime :)
    and the logan story? I'm just hoping my boyfriend isnt like that :O

  7. HAHA. Evvery epic. This is super long though. D: xD Took me about an hour cas it was tiring. xD :)) Congrats!

  8. Oh yeah... Cool new change in blog appearance. xD =D

  9. longest. post. ever. i read it all though. and it was FABULOUS! I would comment on specifics, but that would take way to long and i doubt you'd even read the whole thing so i'm just going to say I loved this post very much. especially the babies. and the camera dude. and the pedo ice cream man. heck, i loved it all.

  10. Oh. My. Gosh. That was SO long! I read the first third of it. Rain check? I'll definitely read the rest on Saturday. I just got past the epic picture thing with the guy. That was so funny! I laughed so much I legitimately posted your link on Facebook and showed my friend. So funny<3 anyway, i'll read the rest later! bye (for now):)

  11. hahahah good old Mr PICM! LOL at those camera pictures as well - and congrats on 100 followers xo

  12. THIS. Was definitely LOL worthy.

    I love your blog.Really do.

    And congrats on reaching 100 followers!!!

  13. I love your blog, it sometimes makes me smile and have I told you how much I LOVE the title? 'I dont skinny dip, I chunky dunk.'

    Some reeeaaalllyyyy awesome books:






    Well those are just some to start with. You HAVE to read them, they're awesome. Also, I LOVE CYANIDE AND HAPPINESS.

  14. I'm following (stalking) you again. I got tired of my little game since you obviously decided to ignore it or whatever.

    So. I give up. You win.

    Anyway, awesome post, by the way. Grr, I want to meet this Logan friend of yours and set him straight. Remember Mark? He sounds exactly like him. Yeah. Not fun.

    That ice cream truck guy is so creepy!!! Just one question, though, and don't be prejudiced when you answer it, okay?: Is he cute?

    It's an innocent question. :P

  15. That was an amazing post! Congratulations on 100 followers! I have three on one blog, two on the other, and even that makes me feel swawesome, yeah? I LOVE BO BURNHAM MORE THAN LIFE ITSELF! Even though I know that he is a bit of a jackass. I'm sorry to burst your bubble but I used to know him because he lived in my friend's neighborhood and he was sort of mean to everyone. But hey, who cares? He's adorable, and funnier than most everyone I know. Your post was amazing, and congrats again!

  16. HUZZAH! I would respond to more, but that would probably take me longer than it did to read this post in the first place :D Congratulations on reaching 100 followers!

  17. Haha love the baby picture! I saw that little "99 followers" thingy and I just had to click the F word (follow; what did you think I meant).

    And I have to agree, Bo Burnham is my idol. I have like his whole album on my iPod.

    Oh and congrats, you've made it onto my blogroll.
    I'm just gonna plug my blog one more time....

    I love spamming....

  18. I pride myself on my surprisingly awkward joke. Congrats on the 100 followers! I'm glad that I helped you achieve that, 'cause if I didn't, you'd be at... 99 followers... :O. Cool blog. I enjoyed the man missing his camera, very much.

    And, ah, Bo Burnham... If I were gay, though I swear I'm straight... I love that kid.

    On YouTube my 2 FAVORITE are Bo Burnham and DaxFlame. If you haven't seen DaxFlame... he makes Bo look not awkward. Somehow.

    I need to advertise you, now. Keep a look out in my next post! :D

  19. UGH, I'm OCD. I said, "joke" when I meant "jokes." Yeah... >.> ...


  20. AND when you were talking about me you said, "bitches will come."

    I laughed.

  21. Thank you so much for the shout-out!!! I'll have to put that thingy in my next post...when I get around to writing it.

    This was a super-long post, but I stuck through to the end. Everything that you wrote about was actually super-interesting, so it was no big task :)

  22. OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG... I can't believe it- EESHIE! In a dress!? omg! its the amazing mammoth that lives in seaside heights,nj. AKA Snooki! That video at the end made me cry, you know? I have a soft spot for autistic people you know? I say you know a lot, don't i?

  23. wow. this was a loooooonnng post. each part definitely lol-worthy, though. haha. i stuck around till the end. honest. haha.
    also, congrats on 100 followers. i still have quite a long way to go before i reach that many. cheers! :D

  24. This was actually not funny. No, I'm not referring to the post. I thought I'd read your most recent post quickly, post a nice introductory comment, say howdy, and get back to my exam revision. Crickey duuuude! It just went on and on and on. Took me 8 minutes to read it :P. But it was lovely!

    Hey Assalamu Alaikum,
    Thank you for visiting my blog, and for the 2 comments.
    Now comment on the post. Okay. It was a long and enjoyable read. Congrats on the followers! And LOL @ the convo with the little kid at the mosque. They just don't know when to be quiet and really do make you shut up XD.
    You asked for book suggestions twice. 8-). I'd give you some, but you'll have to wait till after exams are done. I'm getting people to make me a 'to-read' list for summer. I'll share it with you when it's done.

    Anyway, I'll stop rambling, and be the beginning of a new century of your followers.

    Take care, stay smiling.

  25. that was indeed very epic, congrats on your hundredth!

  26. HOLY CRAP. That was the biggest post I have seen so far. Amazing, despite spending over an hour reading it! Hit me up ;)

  27. Know why you have one hundred followers?
    BECAUSE YOU'RE ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS. And funny funny funny.
    Longest post ever but was I bored? NO! Never!
    Feeling capsy today, I do apologise. Anyway, the bookworm picture was sooo cute! And you let the ice cream man off way way too easily, you're too soft. I'd have eaten him alive. Probably. Maybe not, I'm a bit chicken.
    In terms of books, I don't know! Depends what you like, I guess. I tend to go to the library, read books, then buy them if I like them :P but as much as I'd love to recommend you I've been on a strict diet of self-improving classics and stuff for ages so no potatoes :( Live on the edge and pick some at random aha!!

  28. :)
    This was a 'big' post... I read it in breaks.. but seriously it was worth it.. so many flavors, and yeah you fit into a crazy-happy-go-lucky teen character pretty well...
    Found humor, and then empathy.. a sweet & rare combo..
    You know I am doing research with special children, including autistic children.. These people are really special, sensitive.. Well, if you digest dark literature, you should check dis post i did on special children, that I work with:

    Anyways, another loyal follower in making :)


  29. WTF I think that was the longest post I've ever read WTF WTF?!?

  30. Hhaha, okay, I have the comment box open in a new window next to your post, so I can read and comment at the same time. :D

    That comic up the top is amazing. :D
    Congrats on hitting 100 followers! It's all uphill from here.
    Mr. PICM sounds absolutely DISGUSTING!! Bahahaha, you're hilarious. I love that you said the comment out loud. Make me laugh!
    Those pictures were DEFINITELY epic. How could you NOT give his camera back?
    Oooh, congrats on getting into the high school! Very cool.
    Hahaha, I LOVED THE MOSQUE STORY!! That made my day, seriously.
    Oh, and the baby pictures are adorable!!!
    Those comebacks are totally empowering! Love them.
    Haha, Logan's pretty funny, even though a bit rude. But still funny.
    Book suggestion: Girls in Trouble - Caroline Leavitt
    It's good.
    <3 <3 <3 <3

  31. In all subtlety.

    Wait...did you say IN your dog?

  32. Oh my gosh I love your blog!!! You post the funniest/cutest pictures and those man/woman conversations were hilarious!

    Hope you have a great week dear :)

  33. you are so awesome! haha


  34. that was a long, funny post.

    I totally feel you about the sleazy icecream man...just sleazy older men in general *shudder*. It's so annoying!

    and awww the competitiveness for better grades that girl has totally reminds me of high school...! Don't worry, people don'd to that in college!

    the baby pictures are...interesting. but hey, at least she has a hobby! and dawww, babies :D

    congrats on 100 followers, you deserve it!

  35. i'm halfway to 100 followers...but only like six of them ever comment on anything, so obviously the rest of them died because why else would they ignore me so? aha anyway.
    that camera picture thingamajig was awesome. i approve.

  36. Oh wow, this post is just made of awesome. Congrats on the 100 followers! The baby pics were too adorable, and hahahah how could you not know that wtf means Why The Face?? Lolololo

  37. Hm. 8th on the list. Interesting.

    This post is so long, I don't think I'll comment on any of it. But I just want you to know how much I love your blog, even though it's far surpassed mind and now comparing The Nerd Archives to I Don't Skinny Dip, I Chunky Dunk is like seeing the dwarf lady from the Poltergeist standing next to Michael Jordon wearing elevator shoes.

    I love you to death, Eeshie! Never stop blogging!

  38. hi fellow nycer, congrats on the 100.
    and this is a long ass post O.O

  39. Thanks for commenting the other day... not sure how you stumbled across my blog, but welcome! That was the most epic blog post I have ever read... I'm speechless and very entertained! :)

  40. aww congrats girl! The picturea of the man asking for his camera = epicness!! haha
    and lol at the perverted icecream man story :)

  41. CONGRATS! on the award and 100 followers. The guy with the camera was hilarious. Good job on getting into the school too btw and it's funny what people do with their babies. Thanks for dropping by my blog, I'm a new follower of yours now, it's so funny!

  42. Mr. Lamebutt: Thanks! Yeah, the baby pictures are pretty adorable.

    Aw, you'll get there. I shall help you.

    Ash: Thank you. Thank you again. And you're welcome for the shoutout.

    Right?! I was really freaked out! And no, you're right. Logan needs to be put in his place. How can he say stuff like that?!

    'Awesomesauce on a plate.' That is awesome. I am using that now on.

    Peas out. :DD

    misticalnia: WHOA. WHOA THAT'S COLD. ;P

    Chandana: Thank you! Really?! That made me feel less self-conscious about this long post. :)

    Natalie: YAY! Yeah, I'm living. I think I ought to get a t-shirt that says, “I Talked To Mr. PICM And Survived.”


    Yeah...not quite sure how I felt about that girl...

    Well, not necessarily. I did all that before. I did nothing this year. *guilty look*

    'Le sigh.' I liked that. :D

    Yeah, I heard about the The Book Thief!!

    Hannah Marie: Me, too. YES, having a Logan-type boyfriend would not be fun.

    Hazel: Ha, sorry about that. *sheepish look* Oh thanks! You like?

    Victoria: THANK YOU! I appreciate it when people feel that my blog is fabulous. Your comment made me smile, especially the whole, “heck, I loved it all.”

    April: Yay! I love it when people link to me! (This way, I don't have to do it myself. Just kidding...kind of). Rain check. Ha! That made me laugh.

    Tegan: Thanks. And what exactly do you mean by GOOD old Mr. PICM?!?!

    Lemons: THANK you!! And I love your blog as well, my friend.

    ChickLitGirl: Thank you! Ha, yeah the title *is* pretty awesome, if you ask me...

    Omg! The book links actually helped me! And yes, Cyanide is most excellent.

    Misticalnia: No, I didn't ignore it! I laughed!

    Mark = Logan. Just sayin'.

    Weeelllllllll, I can't say he's cute anymore. If I didn't know his motives, then yes, I'd probably see him as cute. But knowing him, UGH. He's disgusting.

    Elle Barosin: Oh my God, really?! That's hilarious! And not that hard to predict, considering what most of his songs are about, you know? HA.

    Strawberry: HUZZAH INDEED!

    Anthony: The F word? Oh. I thought you meant fiddlesticks. But ah well.

    Bo Burnham is awesome possum.

    Noah Brown: You should pride yourself on your awesome jokes. They're pretty noteworthy. And yeah, thanks for following my blog. You're absolutely right – if not for you, I'd have been at 99 followers. :O

    The man missing his camera was awesome, I agree. He actually has a blog, too.

    DaxFlame? Hmm...never heard of him... (Guess what I'll be doing tomorrow night instead of partying)

    You must! I'm too awesome to not advertise!!

    Noah Brown: Aww, well I understood what you meant.


    Noah Brown: That's nice to know. :P

    Boyd: You're welcome! You definitely deserved it. And aw, sorry about making my post obnoxiously long. I can't help it.

  43. Amb104: I KNOW, I KNOW. Actually, it wasn't like *those* kind of dresses. It was...idk.

    It made me cry too! Yeah, we both have huge soft spots for autistic people. YAY US!

    Ishashime: Ha, sorry. But thank you!!

    Nas: Walaikum Asalam! (Sorry for the misspelled words. I really can't spell...foreign)

    I'M SORRY!! I made this post so long, I know, I know, everyone's commenting on that.

    Ha! Yeah, that little girl really made me feel bad.

    You take care as well.

    Jay: Whoo! Thanks!

    Jay Reid: HOLY CRAP IS RIGHT. Ha, sorry about the longevity of it. I can't help myself. In response to the last sentence of your comment: :D

    Emma:) : Thank you! Thank you thank you thank you THANK YOU!! Your comment made me smile so wide that my cheeks began hurting. And I would never eat something as disgusting as Mr. PICM. :P

    aakash: :) to you as well.

    Aw, thank you! You're too kind...but please, do go on. :P

    Major.Mack: IT'S AWESOME, OKAY?!?!


    Sarah: OMG your comment made my day. You leave the nicest comments ever! Whee!

    Yes, I like the comment as well.
    Thank you! HA, I sure hope so...
    Hey, I didn't mean to! It just...sorta...slipped out?
    That mosque should be a therapist/preacher when she grows up. Just sayin'.
    I KNOW, RIGHT?!? I just want to hug them!!
    I ate admitting that he's funny though. Even though he is. Ah, darn!! I did it again!!
    I shall read a summary...
    <3 <3 <3

    The Game Store Guy: Yes. IN your dog.

    Em [The Writer]: YAY! Thanks!

    Kindros: Thank you!

    Inside the Cabinet of Wonder: GOOD TO KNOW!! And he has his own blog, so you may wanna check it out.

    Binny: It's not just annoying; it's GROSS.

    Thank you! And PHEW! I'm so sick of competition right now.

    Aubree: They were probably diagnosed with the plague...why, thank you for approving.

    Aoife: Thank you!! “Why the Face?” LOL. That's a good one... :D

    That Blond Guy: Well, I mean, it wasn't in any particular order *blushes*

    Noo, don't say that!! The Nerd Archives is just as epic as my old rinky-dink blog. Don't say that! You're making me sad!

    But like I said on your blog, d'awwwwwwwww. That was the sweetest comment ever. I love you to death as well, and if you ever stop blogging, I think I may just take the next plane to Atlanta and find you and fall on my knees to weep and beg you to keep writing.

    Ed: Nyc rocks. Thanks!

    Desesperee de maigrir: Ha ha! Glad I had that effect on you. :)

    kitkat: Thanks!! Yeah, I really loved that camera dude. Not sure I can say the same for Mr. PICM.


    Caity: THANKS!!! Ha, I know it's so weird, right? (I'M GOING TO DO THE SAME WITH MY BABIES!! YAYY!!)

  44. those explosm comics never cease to disappoint.

  45. Agreed, Only in America. Agreed.

  46. Use keywords people will use to conduct a search
    so you can be found. If your post doesn't give that uniqueness and originality, most weblog owners may reject your proposed post. With the increase in only business and blogs amazing popularity it has allowed a union where business blogs have been formed as a way to raise productivity online.

    Look into my page; godaddy coupon

  47. So women can pick the best shade of white that matches her skin tone

    Stop by my site - short informal wedding dresses

  48. The NBER is an important resource for entrepreneurs,
    especially when constructing strategic plans and budget projections

    Look into my homepage :: six flags over texas san antonio coupons


Please leave your message after the beep. *Beeeeeep*