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Friday, March 18, 2011

It's Friday, Friday. Gotta Get Down On Friday.

Looking at the title, you can probably guess what ridiculousness I'll be mentioning in today's post.

Rebecca Black.

You must have heard of her already. Her music video Friday got millions of views. But not because it's amazing -- because it freaking stinks. Really. It's laughably bad.

And just to prove it to you, here's a sample of her lyrics:

Yesterday was Thursday,
Today it-is Friday,
Tomorrow is Saturday
And Sunday comes after...wards


Really, Rebecca? Do you really think we needed to know that? Do you think we're so freaking stupid that we need you to teach us the days of the week?

Try not to commit suicide while watching this.




I hope you guys are still alive. Like, were the lyrics seriously about her debating which seat to take in the car? I mean, not that her "friends" are old enough for a legal driver's license or anything. And what was with all the head-bopping? They were all trying to be cool and whatnot? And what the hell was with that 50-year old black man rapping towards the end? Who is he?!

And on that note...


Hello, friends! As you probably already know, I haven't blogged since Monday. Monday. I've been blog-starved, meaning that I've been wanting to post, but I've had test after test after test after test. And I probably failed all of them, so I guess the hours upon hours upon hours of studying did nothing.

Or not...

Thursday (which was yesterday), we were given a math test that I had absolutely no time to study for. Which stunk. Bad. Fortunately for me, I wasn't hopelessly lost like I thought I'd be. I was getting through it at a steady pace, and before I knew it, I was done.

I began checking my answers, when I heard the girl sitting behind me (Hazel) whisper my name.

"Eeshie! Psst! Eeshie!"

Carefully watching Mr. Goldburg (mentioned before in this post), I turned around.

"What?!"

"Can you get that paper for me? It's under your desk."

I looked under and saw a crumpled piece of paper that looked like garbage. I looked back at Hazel and gave her my look.

"What?" she asked.

"Why am I picking up garbage?"

She lowered her voice. "That's MH's answers."

My eyes widened. MH, my friend who I've mentioned numerous times before (such as in this post), is one of the best in math for my class. And she gives her answers out like crazy (Which I disapprove, of course). She's perfectly fine with letting people cheat off of her, but I'm not.

Anyway. Back to the story!

My eyes widened as I saw the crumpled piece of paper that represented gold right now. Everyone wanted her answers. I gave it to Hazel and whispered, "Give it to me when you're done."

*Sigh* I'm a bad kid.

...Or am I?

Hazel finished copying and gave it to me. I took a deep breath, and told myself I'd only be comparing answers. So I put our sheets side by side...and felt my heart drop when I saw different answers for so many problems. Oh, no...I was upset. Even the answers I felt confident about were different from hers.

I took hold of my eraser to change my answers...and then I stopped. NO! She's not Einsten. Maybe you got the answers right? DON'T CHEAT!
*Sigh* I gave the paper to someone else, proud of myself for not cheating, but upset at the fact that I'd be getting a bad grade now.

...THINK AGAIN.

Today, we got our scores back! And while MH and about the whole class got 87%, I GOT A 93%. And, he added 5 points to everyone who's had all their homeworks, so I GOT A 98%. YEAH, BABAY.

Life is good....
In other news, Wednesday rained like crazy in the morning. Fleur and I were trudging along to school, already cranky because of the weather. And you know what made us even more cranky?

Metal detectors. NYPD. Oh yes.

It was freaking stupid. We turned a bend to enter the school through the cafeteria, and BAM! There was a huge line full of people huddled under umbrellas, and they were moving what seemed like inches every ten minutes.

What the hell is going on?

Fleur and I obviously had to join this line, even though we didn't know what was going on yet. I was really pissed, because I was missing my double period of science. I need double periods of science.

Eventually, we found a kid who knew what was happening.

"They're checking for cell phones and knives and shit," she said, popping her gum.

Fleur and I exchange worried glances, reaching for our phones.

"But, but why? They never told us we couldn't bring phones."

"Actually, it's a school policy. You're not supposed to bring phones. And they wouldn't tell us, cause' this is supposed to be a 'random check'."

"So...they're going to take it away?"

She nodded.

Fleur and I looked at each other again, each of us thinking the same thing: OH $HIT!

First, we thought about putting our phones in our backpacks. We scratched that idea, cause they'd obviously check our backpacks first. Then, we thought about leaving it outside in a secret place only we'd have access to. But the risks for losing it were great, Finally, we decided on sticking our phones in our bra.

Hey. We were desperate. Don't judge me.

The line moved up an inch.

"UGH! I'm missing science!" I groaned/whined to Fleur.

Eventually, Fleur and I got into the building. Our jaws dropped, because our cafeteria had been altered into a freaking airport. They had those full-body metal detectors such as these:



And they also had those conveyor belt-type ones, like these:




I couldn't even recognize my school cafeteria. It was like being in some sort of secret underground headquarters. Or something.

When we went inside, we were put on an even bigger line, with many policemen/women yelling about where to go.

A kinder looking black cop was telling everyone to put anything metal inside our backpacks. I took this as a chance to find out what was happening.

"Um, what are you guys searching for?"

He smiled. "YOU."

Eh?

Anyway, I eventually got to the front of the line. I gave hope on the bra-cell phone plan when I saw the full-body metal detector. There was simply no way out of it.

I put my backpack on the conveyor belt and walked through the metal detector, cringing at the loud beeping. From there, they sent me to another line for people who rang. Which was pretty much the whole school.

I saw a lot of my friends on that line. Go figure.

Two of my friends, Cindy and Ophelia, were really angry. They had no phones on them, yet they had somehow rung and were sent to the line I was in. Ophelia was taken to the metal detectors again to recheck her backpack, and they later found out that the only reason she rung was because of a few quarters.

Wowwwwwwwwwww.

Cindy still did not know why she had rung. Then, one of the Hispanic policewomen started yelling at me in her screechy voice and made me stand with my feet spread out with my hands out in front of me, holding a basket. Then, she checked all over with the handheld metal detector. She was pretty harsh with it, too.



This was what I had to do, except that the lady wasn't as nice as the one shown above. Also, I had to hold my arms out in front of me while holding a basket. Not sure what the basket was for...


After that, she made me get into this really awkward position of leaning against the table and raising one leg in the air, which kind of resembled a dog peeing, but I didn't say anything.

Soon, I was put onto another line.

"WE NEED TWO PEOPLE FROM GRYFFINDOR! TWO PEOPLE!"

Cindy and I decided to get it over with and headed towards a table with our dean, Mr. Sherman (as mentioned before in this super old post). We were told to fill out some stuff, and then Cindy said to him, "I don't have a phone on me. I don't know why I rang."

She left to get rechecked (and later, we found out that it was her camera), and then it was just me.

"So, what do you have?" Mr. Sherman asked me.

"Oh, um, uh..." I said, still flustered about missing class. "I think I have science...?"

He tried hiding his smile. "No, no, I mean what do you have?"

I was confused. "Er...I have science. A double period with Mrs. Marshall?"

By now, he had a wide grin and was laughing at my stupidity. "No, no! I mean what electronic do you have?"

I smiled. "Ohhhhhhhhh! I have a phone!"

"Really?!?! Hand it over."

Shit. I handed it over. He gave me a slip and told me not to lose it, as I'd be getting my phone back through this slip.

Well, everyone was cranky and itchy the rest of the day, at least until seventh or sixth period. We got our phones back, and you could almost hear the kids relax.

It was weird.

And it was only then that I found out why this was all happening.

Obviously, they didn't tell us the real reason. No schools do that, especially if it's some horrible reason. If parents found out about the real reason, they wouldn't let their kids come back to this place. No, the schools told everyone that the random scan was just something that they've been wanting to try for a while. And if that didn't shut you up, they told you stubbornly that the NYPD (New York Police Department, for those of you bright ones who couldn't figure this out) has the right to check kids whenever they want.

But the real reason?

Remember MH's ex-boyfriend Michael who got arrested on this lovely post?

Yeah. More trouble.

Apparently, around 4th period on Tuesday, he got into a fight with some kid. At first, they were just insulting each other verbally. Then, they got into skin. And then, Michael (who I'm pretty sure is insane), whipped out a knife from his pocket and slashed the guy near his neck.

...

...I'm just going to let that sink in for those at home.

And that's when everything fell apart, and they had to call NYPD and get metal detectors.

*Sigh* And to think that MH dated this crazy guy.

...

Well, I guess that's it. And since I have to leave on a good note, I guess I'll share one more story. It's short. Don't worry.

I was walking home with people, and we came to a curb. I blindly kept walking, even though everyone else had stopped. All of a sudden, all these honks and beeps come out of nowhere. I scurried back to my little curb. The school bus that had originally been trying to pass went by. And then, a black man driving the bus scolded me with his finger from inside. Kind of like this, but from a bus.



Excuse me. I'm a pedestrian, so you have to stop by the law.

So we continued on our merry way. Then, we got to the next curb. And this time, coming from the opposite direction, was the same black guy. And this time, the driver's seat was on my side. And his window was open. Again, he scolded me with his finger, smiling. I laughed like crazy, motioning with my hands, What did I do?

It was pretty funny. Actually, now that I think about, it was kind of weird. And stalker-ish. In fact, who goes one way, only to go back the other way in five minutes? WHAT's WRONG WITH HIM?

Watch this after you watch Friday. It's hilarious. WARNING: There's lots of cursing, so maybe you should put the speakers low...in fact, watch it with headphones. Or better yet, watch when no one's home.

But I'm telling you. It's hilarious.

Hey, do you guys remember my Pictures of the Day? I used to have those...I miss those days. Might as well end with a good one now:


Enjoy yourselves.

19 comments:

  1. Oh Rebecca Black. I have no words for her.

    Yay for not cheating on the math test, and having it actually pay off! That is quite awesome. :) It's times like that which give me some faith in karma or whatever, you know, the whole thing where you do good and get rewarded! So yeah.

    But whoooa, all of the metal detector / NYPD / scaryness sounds insane! Your cafeteria was basically turned into a crime scene from what it sounds like! All prompted by the young hooligan ex-boyfriend... tsk tsk... hopefully things settle down sooon, haha. :P

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  2. That math test is awesome! Congrats! I don't remember the last time I got above an 86% on a math test... :P
    And Rebecca Black. *sigh* I still am trying to figure out whether she did this as a parody to show how easy it is to have no talent and become famous, or because she honestly thinks she's good. Oh well.

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  3. It's a sad state of affairs in the music industry.

    And that whole metal detector business must have been pretty crazy, it should all clear up soon though hopefully.

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  4. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAH! the lyrics were suppposed to be stupid, right? I mean, the whole pondering what seat to get in? It's supposed to be like she's saying it in the most simple form possible, right? RIGHT?

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  5. Hey girl!
    Thanks fo your blog, It´s so funny and cute!!
    Thanks for your coment on my blog.
    see u!

    bye!

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  6. good job on your math test! that rebecca black song is indeed annoying :/
    xx
    heyrocketgirl

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  7. oh no, not rebecca black. :O
    those lyrics, they...they burn!
    also, yay for not cheating. glad you decided against it.
    plus, those metal detectors sound super scary. however, if it's for the protection of your school, then i'm for it, i guess. Michael sounds like an, err...interesting fellow.

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  8. Wow, this post is just jam-packed with action. Your school is so much more interesting than mine. We're still coasting on the gossip of a drug bust that took place six months ago.

    Why is it so important to mention that these people are black, hm?!

    I wouldn't believe that Friday wasn't a parody of another song when I first listened to it. I thought Justin Bieber's lyrics were pathetic--these are just beyond words.

    I'm glad you didn't cheat. Good for you, Eeshie!

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  9. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfySK7CLEEg

    And P.S. Thank you so much for introducing me to Cyanide and Happiness way back when. I never get tired of them. Well, sometimes I do. But not today!

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  10. yayyyyyyyy you didnt cheat!! good for you! now that's the eeshie we all love and know haha! that so called "music video" was TERRIBLE! i cant even believe how many views that it got!

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  11. srry again about tht last post! its ehuber930

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  12. I had a good giggle over the cartoon at the end. There are some days that I wish...

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  13. i seriously feel bad for Rebecca, and society as a whole. Its just an embarrassment.

    metal detectors? seriously?!?! that sucks! at the public school in my town, my old neighbor got arrested for hitting a kid over the head with a wrench...(suburban version of knives i guess) but they didn't install metal detectors.....rough.

    thanks for the comment, and i love ya blog. following!

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  14. Oh, Rebecca Black. I feel so terrible for her and yet I want to rip her voice box out of her throat all at the same time. She's insane!

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  15. On Rebecca Black: Kill it, kill it with fire!

    I'm sorry that your school appears to be joining the rest of the country in cowardly hysteria. It's one of the reasons I moved from the States...

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  16. Natalie: I have one: DUMB.
    Yeah, you're right...maybe karma does exist. I think it does. It's actually in a lot of religions, just not called “karma.” And yes, it was incredibly insane. Lol, the “young hooligan ex-boyfriend” line made me chuckle.

    Hannah Marie: It's really funny, because I saw a video on YouTube where she was trying to prove to the world that she can, indeed, sing. She sang it acoustically, in her living room, with all of her friends and family around her. All her friends were smiling and waving their hands back and forth, and her parents were grinning widely, and the guitarist had his eyes closed as he listened to the music spill from her voice...AND IT SUCKED. DEAD SERIOUS. WORSE THAN THE ORIGINAL. HOW CAN THEY LIE TO THEMSELVES LIKE THAT? But, it was funny. :-)

    Salena Sablich:
    1)I did.
    2):O No. No way. They found another one?!
    3)Oh, he is. Even more so in person.

    Ash: It is, isn't it? I feel rotten inside knowing that talentless people are getting so much money. She's already made $20,000 on that song. WHY??

    Tegan: Oh God, those lyrics were bad...and in the video, it was so annoying to see her friends acting all cool in the car, bobbing their heads back and forth...No, Rebecca. Just...no.

    Priscilla Castro: I LOVE THAT NAME. PRISCILLA. WHAT AN AWESOME NAME.

    Reg Rodriguez: Thank you! And tis' very annoying. :-)

    ishashime: The DO burn!! Ah, the horror!

    Christopher: Yup, that's me. Jam-packed with action. And I'm mentioning their black cause' that's what they were! *Flips hair in disgust* Are you trying to call me racist? Yay, thanks! And what was the video all about? Cyanide and Happiness is the best. The. Best.

    Ehuber930: Yayyyyyy I didn't cheat! Good for me! Now that's the Eeshie I know and love! Haha!
    ...See what I did there? I took your comment and changed it up so that it sounds like it's coming from me! Hee hee! I'm so sneaky!

    Christina Farley: I had a good sneeze when I saw the picture. And then I ran to get my nose puffs because I have allergies. Then, I tripped on a flat surface because I am a klutz. Then, I decided to take a few eye drops because my eyes were giving me a head ache. Then, I threw up because I needed to go to the bathroom. Then, I laughed at the picture, because the little people had no fingers, and I found that funny.

    Agent 0017: That's the word: Embarrassment. I couldn't agree more.
    Oh, wow, that sounds like an angry neighbor. Yeesh...and thanks!

    Maggeygrace: She is! She is ABSOLUTELY insane!

    Aaron M. Gipson: I'll get the matches, you get the oil. Got it? Lol.
    I love the way you call them “the States.” *Sigh* That sounds so...foreign...Excuse me for being an absolute, utter GIRL here...

    :D

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  17. They played that dumba$$ song over the loudspeakers in school yesterday.
    And, sorry to do this, but here's another comment about Degrassi, but here it is...
    Metal Detectors, what? do you go to school in Degrassi? And that Rebecca Black thing really shouldn't have to tell us what day of the week it is, and I really don't care what seat she sits in with her underaged friends.

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  18. ...Have I ever told you that I love you?

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  19. Why do some people make vids of them singing?? WHY????
    *faints*

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